I've been listening to a lot of house and techno recently. I'm well feeling it and that but I've still failed completely to go to any four on da floor nights this year as I pledged to myself to do. It's been dubstep dubstep dubstep all bliddy year (plus some garage). Why?
1. I'm skint because I'm too lazy to get a job.
2. London is long like Friends repeats on E4 are in the tooth-piece.
3. When I think about standing in Fabric rushing nauseously on powdery pills while some guy with an intricate fringe plays on his laptop andbrings the kick drum in and out once every six hours, I start yearning for a nice cup of tea, a mortgage and children, and then my nipples start secreting milk everywhere, like Tina from Hollyoaks.
4. The only times I've seen techno/house DJs since Exit festival in 2007 (where I couldn't believe my drug-spun eyes) I've been pretty much bored stiff, rather than MADE STIFF (tee-hee-hee it's an erection joke) by them. The only real exception I can think of to this trend was Billy Nasty playing an acid house set at Bloc Weekend... I should mention that a green laser was shining in my face, I was wearing a tiny suit and I'd been snorting pills for breakfast. BUT the music was sick anyway - it was simple and raw and not overloaded with fussy little FX-farts.
2. London is long like Friends repeats on E4 are in the tooth-piece.
3. When I think about standing in Fabric rushing nauseously on powdery pills while some guy with an intricate fringe plays on his laptop andbrings the kick drum in and out once every six hours, I start yearning for a nice cup of tea, a mortgage and children, and then my nipples start secreting milk everywhere, like Tina from Hollyoaks.
4. The only times I've seen techno/house DJs since Exit festival in 2007 (where I couldn't believe my drug-spun eyes) I've been pretty much bored stiff, rather than MADE STIFF (tee-hee-hee it's an erection joke) by them. The only real exception I can think of to this trend was Billy Nasty playing an acid house set at Bloc Weekend... I should mention that a green laser was shining in my face, I was wearing a tiny suit and I'd been snorting pills for breakfast. BUT the music was sick anyway - it was simple and raw and not overloaded with fussy little FX-farts.
Then again, I've only seen about four house/techno DJs since Exit festival, so I'm not exactly speaking from experience here. I need to get to some four-to-the-floor nights sharpish, preferably with my eyes rolling around behind a pair of Ray-Bans and a picture of a dog vomiting dicks emblazoned across my chest.*
Having typed all that rubbish, perhaps its time to arrive at the point. This Efdemin podcast from Resident Advisor is very great and has been taken down, so I've uploaded it again for anyone that's interested.
LINK HERE
1. KSoul + Ra.H - Turning Poing (sistrum)
2. DJ Jus Ed - Don´t stop Da Da (jus-ed recordings)
3. Manoo - Kodjo (Deeply Rooted House)
4. Raw Artistic Soul ft. Ursula Rucker - The Light (Karizma Deepa 1Ne Dub, Raw Artistic Soul)
5. Cassy - Somelightuntothenight (Beatstreet)
6. Sascha Dive - Deep In Rhythm (Deep Vibes Recordings)
7. DJ Dennis - I love to watch U dance (DJ Buck Remix) (force of nature)
8. Eddie Fowlkes - Save Message Remix (Cityboymusic)
9. Rennie Foster - Monochasm (xplormusic)
10. G-Man - Sparticus (Styrax Leaves)
11. Djinxx - No color man (F...U! Fcom)
12. Tobias - Dial (logistic)
13. Minimal Man - Make a move pt.1 (trelik)
14. Disko 3000 - Sabu Sabu Rugged Mix (body to body)
15. Shakleton - Blood on my hands, Ricardo Villalobos Apocalypso Now Mix (Skull Disco)
16. Petre Inspirescu - de bou (a:rpia:r)
17. Keith Worthy - Deep For Dayz (Sistrum)
18. Brendon Moeller - Pink Noise (Third ear)
19. Ferrer& Sydenham Inc. - The Back Door (Ibadan)
20. Tiger Stripes - Hooked (Liebe*Detail)
21. DJ Koze - All The Time (Philpot)
22. Andy Stott - Massacre (Modern Love)
**I think I should bet on techno nights, really - being in a house crowd might rub me the wrong way. Or to be more accurate, I might rub it the wrong way. Like in the wrong way that a man in a trenchcoat with gigantic spectacles might rub someone in a bus shelter at eleven p.m on the outskirts of Swindon. I wrote on here before about how I'm not a UKG kinda guy, despite fucking loving the music, and the same thing probably applies to house.
On a DNB/Dubstep dancefloor, where being a perma-scowling pleasure-vacuum who appears to be up for undressing the floor with his eyes is considered the very height of cool, I am in my element. But standing in a crowd full of perma-smiling, sunglasses-sporting, shuper-shexshy human-lucozade people who are all there to have a good time WITH EACH OTHER, I fear I will stick out, like a toddler turd in a paddling pool.
Now techno, on the other hand? That's a different kettle of fish in a barrel. I really think I could fit in with a crowd of poker faced skinheads who are perpetually grappling with the persistent conviction that a can of red stripe doesn't taste as nice as it did in 1992 and that Derrick May never got the flowers, and thus are mentally too far away to respond to the music with anything more than a slight chin-tuck or barely audible sigh of utter regret.
I'm not going to be a goth, the makeup is brass.
